True or False: You will have upset parents in Children’s Ministry.
The answer is TRUE!
You can have the most amazing Children’s Ministry in the world and there will still be parents that will find fault with someone or something that involves their child(ren) in the classroom setting or with what is being taught or not being taught correctly at church.
Parents will become upset, angry, or irritated in your ministry. There are a lot of different reasons that may cause these emotions to be displayed or taken out on you in frustration. The parent or caregiver may be stressed, emotionally drained, or tired.
It is important to remember that you, the contributor, can always apologize for something. When it comes to dealing with dismayed parents, apologize for what you can and let them see that you are trying to feel what they feel. Empathizing with them allows them to see that you are trying to understand the situation, difficulty, or inconvenience they are voicing to you.
Proverbs 15:1(NIV): “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
- Diffuse anger and volatile emotions with kindness and love.
- Assure the parent that you are listening to him/her.
- Repeat key points that the parent has made.
- Give the parent an action plan and assure that you’ll follow up. (Action plans will vary based on the individual situation, but may include meeting with other parents, meeting with the Children’s Pastor, offering a resource to the parents, etc.)
Parents want to know that they are not alone in their journey.
- Help diffuse the situation by getting their feedback or opinion.
- Make a turn towards reconciliation by asking to pray with them.
- Pray blessings over their household, child(ren) and family.
- Pray for an answer to help you move forward from the specific issue or complaint, that has been shared with you.
Make sure to notify the Coordinator and/or Children’s Pastor of the incident, particular complaint or circumstance, and have them follow up with the individual, as needed.
For the days and weeks ahead, make sure to follow up with the unhappy parent. Let them know about any steps that will be taken to resolve the issue or complaint. At times, a card, email, or phone call to touch base helps them know you care and are making progress for correction and change.
If you see them in person on a Sunday morning, extend a handshake, wave, or strike up a conversation to further extend open communication.
Remember, kindness dissolves conflict.
Ephesians 4:32(NIV): “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgive each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”